People pleasers are those who will bend over backward to make other people happy, often at their own expense. If you’ve ever wondered whether that’s you, psychologist Dr. Juli Fraga has come up with a few signs that indicate whether you are a people pleaser and shares how it may be affecting your mental health.
Obsessing Over Their Feelings While Neglecting Your Own
Have you ever thought that someone might be in a bad mood because of you, and you need to fix that ASAP? If yes, then you may be a people pleaser. It’s not your job to make up for someone else’s low mood, especially at the expense of your mental health. For example, many try to avoid conflicts by agreeing to everything others say, even if they don’t believe it.
According to Dr Fraga, people pleasers often feel like their feelings are not important, so they try to suppress them and don’t share them with others. If you are only listening to other people’s problems all day long without acknowledging your own, it’s going to affect your mental health in the long run. Everyone needs to unload their stress and needs a friendly ear to listen. Dr. Fraga suggests that people pleasers might feel that their feelings are a burden to others or could be a reason for others to abandon them if they share too much.
Being a “Yes” Man and Agreeing With Everything
When it comes to saying “yes,” there’s a difference between being helpful and being a pushover. Being helpful will always take you far in life, but if you take on things that you aren’t equipped to handle, you’re biting off more than you can chew and can damage both your mental health and your relationships.
Along similar lines, if you agree with someone you don’t actually agree with just to avoid a conflict, that’s a people-pleasing behavior. It’s normal to do this every once in a while, but if you never feel comfortable sharing your true opinion about something, then you need to re-evaluate.